|1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.|
|2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.|
|3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.|
|4. A dog's parents never visit.|
|5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.|
|6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.|
|7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk..|
|8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.|
|9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"|
|10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.|
|11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.|
|12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.|
|13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.|
And last, but certainly not least:|
14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.
Ultimate True Test: Lock your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car for an hour.